If you and your spouse are considering divorce after many years of being married, know that you are not alone. Even if you are at the point in your marriage where you have both discussed divorce as an option, if you are seeking help from a couples counselor you know there is still a chance to save your marriage. When this is the case, you want to do everything possible to work through your problems and come to a solution that involves remaining together. Before calling your attorneys to discuss the terms of your divorce, consider getting marriage advice from a couples counselor. Divorce should never be the first option in a marriage that is experiencing difficulty, but a last resort. For more information and to schedule your first session, call us now. Below, you will find some of the techniques we offer to the couples who come into our counseling sessions so they can save their marriage before a divorce.
- Make a List. When a couple comes into our office and they are preparing for a divorce, one of the best things they can each do is make a list of changes. These changes are what they need so that the relationship can work and divorce is avoided. It may be two changes or it may be five. Whatever list you come up with, make sure you and your partner can both take responsibility for effecting these changes. This can begin tearing down the process of pointing fingers at the other person and taking responsibility for how you can fix your marriage.
- Treat Them Like You’re Dating. One of the best techniques we discuss in our sessions is “dating.” When you reflect on your marriage now, what brought you to the brink of divorce? Would you treat your spouse this way if you were just starting out as a couple? Go back to that honeymoon phase and fall in love all over again.
- Choose Communication Over Resentment. Over the years, poor communication leads to resentment. The more resentment you build up as a couple, the less opportunity you have to discuss your feelings with each other openly and honestly. The sooner you begin discussing what you are resentful about, the sooner you begin to let go of that resentment. This can allow you to see your spouse in a whole new way.
- Take Time Away. Before jumping into a divorce, you and your spouse should give each other the space they need to weigh the options, make a pros and cons list, and reflect on your relationship. This allows you and your spouse to take time away from distractions to think both practically and emotionally. What drew you into the relationship in the first place? What negative things could happen as a result of the divorce? How will your children handle it?
Divorce lawyers in Arlington, TX, like from Brandy Austin Law Firm, PLLC, want every client who comes through their doors to make informed decisions before starting the divorce process. When you work with couples counselors, you are working with people who care about your relationship and want to avoid the divorce process.